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How to handle a dispute? Please let me know your thoughts!

Hi everyone!

I would really appreciate your help regarding a transaction I’ve made with a trusted dealer (with a long experience of buying & selling) in a FB group where we can’t agree on a fair solution for both parties. I think it is most fair to not name either the dealer or the FB group and just focus on the facts.

Ok, here is the full (long) story: I sold two autographs for $520 to him and he got to choose if he wanted to pay a higher sum with Goods&Service or a lesser sum with Friends&Family, he chose to pay F&F. I then asked him if he wanted the package marked with a low value to avoid custom fees and he said yes to this. (See photo 1&2)

In my opinion both these choices were made to save the buyer money but both choises comes with a higher risk involved, which the buyer for sure knew since he has a long experience in the autograph community. I have myself bought lots of items where the sellers have marked the package low to save me from custom fees, always with the understanding that it means that it will not be insured and that I, as the buyer, will take the hit if something happens. I have always thought that was kind of a mutual understanding among collectors when marking an item with a low value.

The package was then shipped with trackingnumber and is trackable from me in Sweden to the buyer in the US. There is no way for me to put a $15 value on an item and then insure it for $520, since both shipping and insurance are bought from the same person at the postal office.

Unfortunally this time the package got lost, the US postal service has done an investigation and can’t find it.

The result of the buyers two choises above is that neither paypal (can’t use its buyer and seller protection since the payment was done with Friends&Family) or the swedish postal service (since it was marked with a low value) will cover for the lost package, meaning that if refunded I will take the full hit.

In my opinion I asked the buyer what he wanted, he got to decide what would be best for him and then I did as we agreed on. And now he still says this is all on me and that I should refund him all the money. I have offered him a 50% refund to be fair, although I tecnically don’t have to since he chose to pay with Friends&Family. And to be honest, the way he’s behaving I’m thinking of just block him and give him nothing back!!

When trying to explain this to the buyer he said that I was totally wrong and that he would make a thread on FB where he would ask the members for their opinion and according to him these replies would then determine how we settle this. But for some reason (!!!) he didn’t mention anything about him chosing Friends&Family and a low value on the package, that I shipped with trackingnumber and that I despite this still have offered him a 50% refund. If I didn’t know better it’s almost as if he did that on purpose to get the answers he wanted… He then uses the answers from the (misled) members to push me to refund him. And when contacting me with the results he for some reason only attach screenprints from the members that agrees with him, not everyone who doesn’t…

And now it has gone so far that he makes ”hidden threats” against me, saying that he will make a public post if I doesn’t fully refund him.

To get advices I’ve asked several of my long time collector friends how to handle this and one would refund even though he thinks the blaim isn’t on me, two would try to find a solution that both are happy with and the last three said that I shouldn’t refund anything, that the buyer fully knew what he was doing.

I have sold hundreds of autographs over the years and there have never been any problems until this autumn were two packages got lost at the same time. But the other had been marked with a correct value so after a long discussion with the swedish postal service (they never makes it easy) they finally covered the lost package and I could refund the seller and that situation got resolved. But the above is a very unfortunate situation for me. Here’s a link to some feedback I recieved at Autograph Magazine Live when selling here: https://live.autographmagazine.com/forum/topics/member-gogo?xg_source=activity

I would greatly appreciate your thoughts about this situation. Thank you for helping and take care!

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No worries, did the FB Admins make a decision yet?

They will allow a post with a review of the transaction as long it is in a good manner. And if it goes that way, I will reply with my side of the story. I’m confident that discussion will not be a problem for me…

And they will not be any kind of judge in this situation and I never asked them to be that anyway. But they don’t t think I did anything wrong here, past what many/most people does!

If he gave him 50% and it turns up he will keep both anyway. That was my point.

Of course; however, there will be a backlog which should clear in the next 3 weeks and if he gives it 30 days then the parcel should either be definitely lost or get delivered so he may only lose 50%. 

If you do give him a partial refund. Send it as a business transaction with details of the missing package and tracking number etc, so it will be easier for you to make a claim back if it does turn up after the refund.

Great point

That’s a great advice! You mean as a normal G&S transaction with all the details added?

Yes. So PayPal will be able to come to a decision if there is a problem. Write down the reason for the refund. Details of the item and postal and tracking details. Then agree with the buyer to return the refund if the package turns up. And send the refund on the condition of this agreement. So if it does turn up and he refuses to give back the refund it will be a lot easier to get a decision in your favour.

Don't refund on FF or you risk losing out again.

Great, thank you!

There is no transaction to base this upon.  The buyer did not pay for any G&S...they sent a friend or family member money which, as I understand it, was not specifically earmarked.  Could have been your best friend helping pay for Christmas gifts for your family for all anyone else would know.  Any electronic paper trail begun now has no legal reference to an actual PayPal transaction.  

It would seem the best hope is to just work out something informally that will be considered fair for both of you since there is no documented sale to base this upon. 

dont becuase your giving him blackmail aginst you.

just pay him thru paypal regular and put  partial rfeund for and say the itiem thats all or for missing itiembut becuareful how detail you go into in the actual paypal message box

donrt list deitail paypal can hold it against you and its written proof he needs to jam you up

personaly he doesnt deserve  a cent and i wouldnt send him one

Once again Marc, I really appreciate your help! I haven’t yet decided how to do, so your tips and advices are really helpful!

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