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How to handle a dispute? Please let me know your thoughts!
Hi everyone!
I would really appreciate your help regarding a transaction I’ve made with a trusted dealer (with a long experience of buying & selling) in a FB group where we can’t agree on a fair solution for both parties. I think it is most fair to not name either the dealer or the FB group and just focus on the facts.
Ok, here is the full (long) story: I sold two autographs for $520 to him and he got to choose if he wanted to pay a higher sum with Goods&Service or a lesser sum with Friends&Family, he chose to pay F&F. I then asked him if he wanted the package marked with a low value to avoid custom fees and he said yes to this. (See photo 1&2)
In my opinion both these choices were made to save the buyer money but both choises comes with a higher risk involved, which the buyer for sure knew since he has a long experience in the autograph community. I have myself bought lots of items where the sellers have marked the package low to save me from custom fees, always with the understanding that it means that it will not be insured and that I, as the buyer, will take the hit if something happens. I have always thought that was kind of a mutual understanding among collectors when marking an item with a low value.
The package was then shipped with trackingnumber and is trackable from me in Sweden to the buyer in the US. There is no way for me to put a $15 value on an item and then insure it for $520, since both shipping and insurance are bought from the same person at the postal office.
Unfortunally this time the package got lost, the US postal service has done an investigation and can’t find it.
The result of the buyers two choises above is that neither paypal (can’t use its buyer and seller protection since the payment was done with Friends&Family) or the swedish postal service (since it was marked with a low value) will cover for the lost package, meaning that if refunded I will take the full hit.
In my opinion I asked the buyer what he wanted, he got to decide what would be best for him and then I did as we agreed on. And now he still says this is all on me and that I should refund him all the money. I have offered him a 50% refund to be fair, although I tecnically don’t have to since he chose to pay with Friends&Family. And to be honest, the way he’s behaving I’m thinking of just block him and give him nothing back!!
When trying to explain this to the buyer he said that I was totally wrong and that he would make a thread on FB where he would ask the members for their opinion and according to him these replies would then determine how we settle this. But for some reason (!!!) he didn’t mention anything about him chosing Friends&Family and a low value on the package, that I shipped with trackingnumber and that I despite this still have offered him a 50% refund. If I didn’t know better it’s almost as if he did that on purpose to get the answers he wanted… He then uses the answers from the (misled) members to push me to refund him. And when contacting me with the results he for some reason only attach screenprints from the members that agrees with him, not everyone who doesn’t…
And now it has gone so far that he makes ”hidden threats” against me, saying that he will make a public post if I doesn’t fully refund him.
To get advices I’ve asked several of my long time collector friends how to handle this and one would refund even though he thinks the blaim isn’t on me, two would try to find a solution that both are happy with and the last three said that I shouldn’t refund anything, that the buyer fully knew what he was doing.
I have sold hundreds of autographs over the years and there have never been any problems until this autumn were two packages got lost at the same time. But the other had been marked with a correct value so after a long discussion with the swedish postal service (they never makes it easy) they finally covered the lost package and I could refund the seller and that situation got resolved. But the above is a very unfortunate situation for me. Here’s a link to some feedback I recieved at Autograph Magazine Live when selling here: https://live.autographmagazine.com/forum/topics/member-gogo?xg_source=activity
I would greatly appreciate your thoughts about this situation. Thank you for helping and take care!
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Eddy on
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Agree with Eric here......it's an expensive lesson learned. Customer good will and service are great priorities to have (and admirable). That being said, as the seller, you are in the driver's seat to assure as much as possible a smooth transaction.
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Permalink Reply by Cogo on
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No, we wouldn’t! And that is a huge lesson learned!
But I don’t agree that this makes it 100% on me since the buyer got to chose and I then did as he wanted. And that is why I suggested that we split the loss 50/50!
And then I’m not even taking his bad manners in our private discussion into consideration! Yes, I want to do the right thing but that part doesn’t only aply to me.
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Permalink Reply by Dan Morris on
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The fact you offer 50% shows great Kudos and to be abused when he chose the cheap option shows his true colours. As you say, lesson learned and you'll probably find in 3 weeks that it gets delivered so you might want to still hold off refunding until a bit more time has passed.
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I agree, did the same many year ago as a favour and learned my lesson to never do it again
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Based on the fact he chose the option of F&F he has no come back. Walk away, keep the 50% on the table and in future maybe not offer the options unless under say $100 for the item.
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I have to respectfully disagree with this line of thinking. The customer chose the option because it was offered by the seller as I understand it. Friends and Family has that designation for a reason (and it's not designed for discounts in a business transaction).
Here's the flip side. Recently I was asked by a seller to pay for an autograph via F&F. The seller is neither friend nor family to me....they are a vendor only. I just stopped right there because, in this case, I would have been responsible as the buyer in accepting.
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....and as far as evading customs charges, that's why you will see sellers on eBay who do ship internationally say in no uncertain terms something to the effect of: WE WILL NOT LIE TO CUSTOMS, PLEASE DO NOT ASK.
Again, seller is in the driver's seat... otherwise those kind of notices would be useless.
I know it's hard, but it's also reality as a seller's responsibilities, IMHO.
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Permalink Reply by Eric Keith Longo on
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Evading Customs is not part of a good business strategy. Shame it needs saying.
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You’re 100% correct, I will not argue about that.
But paying at least 30% in custom fees on top of the sale price + expensive shipping + insurance when buying from the US makes it difficult to buy autographs when living abroad.
It’s not right, but I know it’s a VERY common thing to do.
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Agreed, although it is amazing how many buyers ask sellers to lie!
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Everyone is entitled to their opinions, no worries!
But isn’t you (Etienne) contradicting yourself just a bit in your two latest replies above? You say that it is the sellers responsibility if he/she offers F&F, but you also say that you as a buyer would have been responsable if accepting F&F???
And just to be clear, I also offered G&S so it was up to the buyer to decide. I didn’t ”force” anyone to accept F&F.
But you’re correct about the moral part, that’s a lesson learned for sure!
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